Bend, move with the wind
Another one of those days that feels like it blended into a big gormut of blah. Is gormut a word? I don't know...maybe it just sounds cool. I am this close from quitting my job. I have the worst possible shifts, and it seems as though the people that bitch the most, get the best shifts. The ones that are quiet and personable - get the very worst. I'm sick of management, people in general, and the notion that "the customer is always right." I am sick of being a servant to those who do not appreciate it. I am sick of old women. And young women. And the bitches that come in at 10:30 at night, demanding separate checks, and that they need them in 5 minutes. The ones that whine when they found out I added 18% gratuity to all of their bills. That's right. I just gratted you bi-atch, you like it that I don't trust you right? (With any party over 10 people, the server has the right to add an 18% grat.)
So yeah, I am fed up. I really don't get along with anyone there except L. I really do not feel liked by anyone else. Their attitudes diminish good spirits.
Most fortunately, I have all of Saturday off to chill and go out with my love! Ben and I will probably go and fetch some good ol' Mongolian Barbecue. Yummy!
As far as recovery goes; I have taken notice to my emotions and when they are raging - instead of grabbing a jar of peanut butter - I write. Or I take pictures. When I was exhausted after work the other day, I did not push myself to run. Instead, I enjoyed a nap. Listening to my body's signals is something very new to me. Either I starve it, stuff it, or exhaust it. I never listen to what my body wants. My body is gaining new meaning. My body. It is mine and no one else's. My body has a voice, and it knows what it wants. It knows when it is being stuffed to feel numb. It knows when it is being starved to feel numb. My body wants to feel. Not diet or lose more weight. My attempts to control it have only ended in deep depression, disappointment, and a never ending circle of defeat.
To let go...
"As I started to picture the trees in the storm, the answer began to dawn on me. The trees in the storm don't try to stand up straight and tall and erect. They allow themselves to bend and be blown with the wind. They understand the power of letting go. Those trees and those branches that try too hard to stand up strong and straight are the ones that break. Now is not the time for you to be strong, Julia, or you, too, will break." Julia Butterfly Hill
So yeah, I am fed up. I really don't get along with anyone there except L. I really do not feel liked by anyone else. Their attitudes diminish good spirits.
Most fortunately, I have all of Saturday off to chill and go out with my love! Ben and I will probably go and fetch some good ol' Mongolian Barbecue. Yummy!
As far as recovery goes; I have taken notice to my emotions and when they are raging - instead of grabbing a jar of peanut butter - I write. Or I take pictures. When I was exhausted after work the other day, I did not push myself to run. Instead, I enjoyed a nap. Listening to my body's signals is something very new to me. Either I starve it, stuff it, or exhaust it. I never listen to what my body wants. My body is gaining new meaning. My body. It is mine and no one else's. My body has a voice, and it knows what it wants. It knows when it is being stuffed to feel numb. It knows when it is being starved to feel numb. My body wants to feel. Not diet or lose more weight. My attempts to control it have only ended in deep depression, disappointment, and a never ending circle of defeat.
To let go...
"As I started to picture the trees in the storm, the answer began to dawn on me. The trees in the storm don't try to stand up straight and tall and erect. They allow themselves to bend and be blown with the wind. They understand the power of letting go. Those trees and those branches that try too hard to stand up strong and straight are the ones that break. Now is not the time for you to be strong, Julia, or you, too, will break." Julia Butterfly Hill
posted by Sara at 9:22 PM
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